Perspective 2 Corinthians 4:16-18
This verse is all about perspective, how we see things in the world.
How we see things in our life is more powerful than we imagine. If we see the world as a place that solely is responsible for our enjoyment and good fortune, when the hardships come we can get angry and frustrated; “I don’t deserve this.” On the other hand, if we see ourselves as less deserving than others, when someone reaches out to offer a kindness we push them away because again, “I don’t deserve this”
Many people see the Christian church as a whole full of hypocrites. They see the pews full of people who call them out for their sin while doing the exact same thing. I have a friend who I have known since grade school and he says that many churches have called him out for his lifestyle while never saying a word to the man in the pew who is having an affair.
Sometimes our perspective comes from what we see or what we experience. It was a year, maybe two after 9/11. We were going to Florida and while in the airport we saw a family; father, mother and two children who were obviously Muslim. They were polite, just going on a family vacation and I remember thinking, “Please don’t let them be on our plane.” Sure enough we settled into our seats and this family came on board. I’m ashamed to say my immediate reaction was fear. My perception of them was colored by events that had nothing to do with them. I said a prayer, not asking God to keep our flight safe, but a prayer asking God to help me see them without fear, to see them as they really are; a family like ours simply going on vacation.
Sometimes our perception is based on what we don’t see. When our son --- was in kindergarten he used to come home crying because he had no friends. This happened day after day and I decided to go talk to his teacher about what was happening. She told me over the phone that she didn’t notice a problem but I was welcome to come and see for myself. When I got there --- was in a group of children playing and laughing, and later when he got home he again was crying because he said he had no friends. Somehow he developed the perspective that he had no friends despite circumstances to the contrary. The teacher started saying things like “Thayne, can you and your friend Billy do …” We started to drop in at pre-arraigned times and told him “we just want to meet your friends.” It wasn’t long before his perception changed.
There are people who look at churches this way. They have a perception that we’re all hypocrites or that we’re just waiting to pounce on them for what we think of as their sin. If you ask them why they think that way a lot of the time they have no reason or experience to justify their attitude. We should deal with them like we dealt with my son; have conversations and say how our church welcomes new members and visitors with no pre-set requirements, how our children are important to our church family, how our fellowship shares prayer, luncheons, fun days with no desires other than to have a good time and to become better friends. With the Holy Spirit’s help their perception may change.
Sometimes our perception of ourselves is based on what we’re told. A few years ago I was asked to council a couple who were having trouble in their marriage. I remember one of the first things he said was, “She can’t do anything right.” We had several sessions and before we could work on rebuilding trust and respect he needed to understand he wasn’t perfect and his wife had merit. We also had to get her to understand she had value and wasn’t always wrong.
Her perspective of herself was solely what he said about her. In honesty this was an abusive relationship and they eventually divorced. I always would like to see a couple be able to work things out but I will never believe that to that end God wants you to stay in an abusive relationship.
So far none of this is particularly insightful but we should be aware that all these same things apply to our faith. How we see God working or not working in our lives affects how we respond to our faith, even if our perception of what God is doing is inaccurate to what is really happening.
Our experience with those of faith affects how we think of faith in general. Were the people in church friendly and welcoming or was there visible infighting for visitors to see? Was their service focused on God and Christ’s work? Did the leaders of the church place requirements on the congregation that they themselves failed to live up to? Did the minister place Jesus front and center or did he or she promote themselves over Jesus? I’ve heard pastors who never mentioned Jesus in their messages. One or more of these things can happen to you in a single church and it can affect your perception of all churches. Things like this can cause people to never go to church and it can cause people who have gone to church for years to stop.
Paul addresses all this in these sentences. Jesus is perfect; his motivation is always the Father. Jesus perception of himself, his work, the world and the Father was a constant; even as the Pharisees questioned him, even as his disciples didn’t understand him, even as he was nailed to the cross his motivation and perception remained the same.
We are human; we are influenced by what we see, by how we are treated, by the things happening around us. When things happen we have the choice of allowing them to influence our perceptions of our life, of our church, of ourselves; or of turning to God and seeing his infinite love, understanding and acceptance for as Paul writes our eternal glory far outweighs our momentary troubles.
Leave an abusive relationship. See with clarity what is happening in your life. Check to see if your pastor or church leaders are scripturally sound; remember, if it sounds wrong, it probably is. Ignore those who put you down because you have been fearfully and wonderfully made. Believe what Paul writes; what we hear, what we see is temporary. God and salvation are eternal; let that knowledge influence you.
This weekend the National Association of Christian Congregational Churches has joined us in promoting “Jared’s Hope” and again Jen and I are extremely thankful and blessed by their participation. For those who don’t know “Jared’s Hope” is our initiative to get our pulpits to be a welcoming place of safety and a place of resources to help those suffering from the disease of addiction and those who contemplate suicide and their families and loved ones. Our family’s experience with this disease is why I chose these verses on perception.
As we see we all have perceptions of ourselves. I’m a father, a brother, a son, a husband, a pastor, a friend; and all of these influence how I see myself and what happens around me.
I have a friend that say’s “I’m a diabetic.” No, you’re a wife, a mom; that’s what you are, diabetes is your condition. She lets diabetes define how she sees herself and her life.
I’ve been in many rooms where I heard people say “I’m an alcoholic,” “I’m an addict.” I’m not trying to make less of the struggles these people are going through, I’ve seen the devastation this disease causes people and those around them. More than a few times our son Jared said “I’m an addict, what’s the point? Why bother to try.” The hardest thing for us was that we were not able to change his perception of himself. You’re a man, a son, a brother; addiction is your disease. And like diabetes it has symptoms that can be managed. I know how hard that is, how it’s a daily struggle, but if you don’t think of yourself as more than your disease, the disease becomes everything in your world; it becomes the definer of your life.
Jared thought of himself as his disease. If you cannot think of yourself as worthy, as more than what someone else says then they become what your world revolves around and they become what defines you. Jared believed what others said, that he was just an addict and he was no good. What others said became the perception he saw himself as.
As I was writing this I kept coming back to Paul. He was thought of as a traitor of his faith, as a blasphemer, as someone to be hunted down and eliminated. It would be easy to let that become the center of his world, easy to let that color his perception of himself, easy to let that change the course of his life.
Galatians 1:15, “But when God, who had set me apart even from my mother’s womb, called me…” Paul knew who he was; called by God and worthy of Christ. And that was the center of his life, the lens that focused his perception of himself. Not what others said, not the thorn in his side.
When we were watching Jared struggle with his addiction we didn’t know who to turn to. Frankly we were embarrassed to talk to our minister. Jen and my prayer is that our pulpits will be a place of refuge and safety, a place of resources for those who suffer from the disease of addiction. We pray that faith leaders will be a source of hope and strength for those who are afflicted and for their families and friends.
Again Jen and I thank our national Congregational association for taking our mission and spreading it to all Congregational churches this weekend.
So again we pray for those faith leaders who are approached for help. We pray for those who are afflicted, we ask God to lead them to recovery. We pray for the families and friends who see the pain and disease of their loved ones and we ask God to give them strength. We pray for those who are left behind by the death of a loved one. May they see God as the peace of mind and the strength of spirit as they mourn and struggle to put their lives back together.
Amen.